"Aren't you the clever one!" said Dad, patting me on the back, "Problem solved!"

"What do you mean 'problem solved'?" said Mum, "Do you know how much water that vine needs?"

"No?" said Dad, "Do you?"

"We could ask?" I suggested.

So we asked, and Dad found out that the beau-stalk had got its roots into the main water supply for the city. They had forced their way into the pipe under our back lawn and followed it all the way to the main reservoir. There wasn't a drop left for the city. It was drying up because it had used all the water.

"Five hundred thousand gallons!" said Dad, "Fancy that."

"Will they send us a bill, do you think?"

"No son," said Dad with a big, confident smile.

When the bill arrived. Dad stared at it for a few seconds, then he screwed it up and threw it in the rubbish.

"They can't charge us that much!" he said, "Its daylight robbery!"

"How much was it for?" I asked.

"Half a million!" said Dad.

"That's not very fair," I said, "You didn't know how much water the bean-stalk would need. Why don't you send the bill to the man in the shop. He sold them to you. Maybe his money back guarantee covers this?"

"Good idea," said Dad.

But when we got to the shop it was closed. Everything was gone from the shelves, and the letterbox slot was covered by a board nailed over it.

"Looks like he doesn't want the bill," said Dad, "Oh well, back to square one."

"What's square one?"

"You'll understand when you're older," said Dad. Which is why I wrote this account of everything, so you would learn lots of wise things from my Mum and Dad. They really are the greatest Mum and Dad around, except when they're grouchy, and now that Dad's got a job we can afford to buy other food as well as chips and fizz and