ChristArt - Articles

Are you afraid?

(Sep. 10, 2000)

As I grew in my Christian walk, a time came when I was given the opportunity to teach my first Bible lesson. I was strongly convinced of the necessity of serving the Lord fully and planned to teach on that. One night while typing the lesson into my computer, I felt something eery in the air. A little later I went to bed. That night I was suddenly awakened at 3:00 am. Immediately upon waking, my body was fully and evenly pressed against my bed and I was pinned down. Something was holding me down, but what ever it was, it was invisible. I believe it was a demon.

At that moment in time some very clear things were communicated to my mind:

1. This thing that was on me was very evil.
2. This thing did not like me. It even tauntingly pressed my head a couple times into my pillow.
3. This thing wanted to come into me. It strongly pressed for this and I had a compulsion to let it in.
4. I could let it into me by just willing it to come in.

I wanted nothing of this thing. It scared the heck out of me. I said "T-The-the L-Lo-Lord rebuke y-you." It didn't go away. My fear made it obvious that I had not the faith to chase this away. Then I said "Jesus, take it away." Immediately it left me. I jumped out of bed and walked around. I wanted to talk to someone, but 3:00 am was the wrong time to start a conversation. I went back to sleep.

The next morning I was still scared. If you could picture this, it was as if I was walking backward in fear of this thing moving toward God. In horror, I was looking at someone who I was afraid of to go to someone who was safe. I knew that it was wrong for me to fear Satan, and this new experience taught me that in the face of danger, I didn't trust God. I wanted to pray that God would prevent this from ever happing again. It was very hard, but I prayed: "Lord, I don't ask you to prevent this from happening again, I pray that if it happens again that I would not be afraid."

I shared this experience with my friends Christian and Leroy; who also live with me at the Serviceman's Christian Center at the time. Christian told me that he had this same this experience twice before. Leroy said it happend to him 3 or 4 times. I found out that this evil visitor finally stopped dropping by once they stopped fearing it and were able to rebuke it with faith.

My lesson in all of this was that fearing anything else but God was wrong. I look back on this as a time when Satan introduced himself as a very powerful and very evil foe. It was as if he was telling me to watch my step. I was never visited again.

When something makes me afraid, I have learned to say, "God doesn't need this to kill me." I know that I live or die by the will of God. I will not die a second before He says so. Maybe someday I'll be tried again to see if I fear no one but God. I pray that I will pass that test.

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