ChristArt - Articles

Whats the point?

(Nov. 26, 2000)

In 1987 God told me to go on a summer mission trip. I mean God really told me. I didn't want to go, but He took me by the collar, shook me a couple times and said, "Go!" I have never before, nor ever since been so convinced of God's will for me. As it turned out, I had a miserable time.

Funny how that worked out, the greatest leading I ever received lead me into one of my life's most miserable experiences. Many times during that trip I questioned whether I was in God's will, but every time I was reminded of my calling and knew I was in the right place. You could say the calling equaled the trial. And it was a trial I never anticipated.

Boy, did I have it all wrong. I was ready to go, expecting a time of real blessing, confident of Gods calling. Looking back I suppose I was also confident in my own ability. As an ex-Green beret I camped in many hard areas: the Sahara Desert, the Yatta Plateau, the Continental Divide, the Ozarks and other places. As I looked forward to the mission trip I envisioned a bunch of Spirit filled green horns looking up to me as I gave them pointers on how to set up a tent. I, as the mission's assistant leader would be some kind of hero.

What I got was a bunch of confused carnal-minded teenagers who were more likely wanting to see the world than to serve God. They were not Spirt filled (nor needed any help with pitching a tent). I'm sure my military mentality didn't go over too well with them either. I was hard and they resisted my authority at every opportunity.

The head leader didn't help much in the situation either. He was also without spiritual discernment. This may seem like ranting, there were many incidents to justify this claim, but let me rest this accusation by revealing one incident: He knowingly took all the teens to a nude beach as a weekend rest from our mission project. I remained behind.

I was isolated, without friends, far from home. My faith was questioned and my strength was tried. I was determined and strong, but I was also ignorant concerning the nature of man and unskilled in patience, humility and teaching. My efforts bore little fruit and I could not understand why I was there. In the end I received bad reviews from the teens and leaders. I was not invited to return to be a leader with Teen Missions again.

So what happened? Why did God send a flint-faced, unloving, hard nose as myself on a summer mission? Because I, at that time was just the person a rebellious 14 year old girl named Jennifer needed to butt heads with. I questioned her love for God saying that those who love God obey His commands. After a few exchanges of accusation and defense, Jennifer broke into tears and stopped fighting the hard truth I threw at her.

This was my purpose during the summer of 87, although I didn't understand the full impact of it yet. After I finished this trip I started my freshman year at Moody Bible Institute. God allowed me to bump into a friend of Jennifer's at Moody. He was planning to visit her later that day and invited me to come along (Jennifer lived near Moody at that time). When I arrived as an unexpected guest Jennifer ran past her friend and gave me a big hug. She introduced me to her father who warmly greeted me and welcomed me into their home. Apparently Jennifer had a history of rebellion and returned from the mission trip a changed person, giving me much credit. Her father, an elder or deacon (I don't remember) of Moody Church laid his hands on me and prayed over me.

After all the frustration and rejection of the summer mission I finally received some needed acceptance. I understood why I was sent. My work was acknowledged. Hopefully, my personality has softened since then. I thank God that He used this dull instrument. I became a servant of God because I obeyed and not because I had anything to offer.

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