Wording of this Handout:
Interesting facts about Santa Claus
Santa Claus visits about 15% of the world's population (some 91.8 million homes).
He has 31 hours to work, assuming that he travels east to west over the different time-zones.
He makes 822.6 visits every second.
He has less than one second per visit in which to park his sleigh, go down the chimney, fill the stockings, eat a snack, go back up the chimney, and fly to the next house.
He travels at about 3000 times the speed of sound.
He carries a load of presents which wights about 321,300 tons. (At 2 lbs per present).
If Santa Clause flies at the speed we have calculated, he should burst into flames as he streaks through the atmosphere .... so obviously, he must be doing some pretty cool magic!
HO HO HO
Patient: Please, give me your opinion! Am I going to die?
Doctor: Yes.
Patient: Oh no! Can I have another opinion?
Doctor: Certainly. I thing you're ugly too.
Er, um....