I lie alone here in my bed.
Thoughts of suicide flash through my head.
How can one person bear so much pain?
Has my whole life - school, friends, and sports - all been in vain?
What is this life really about?
The thoughts in my mind are those only of doubt.
Where is God to answer my questions galore?
Where was He when my heart and soul tore?
His son said, "I will never forsake thee."
But when I needed Him most He wasn't with me.
God, please tell me, do You just not care?
If you did, then wouldn't You be there?
Satan and his demons whisper in my ears.
They whisper things that bring me to tears.
These are the things they whisper to me:
"You're stupid, fat, and ugly."
"There is no God. He never sent His Son."
"It takes one bullet. Only one."
"JESUS!" I cry and fall to my knees.
"I need Your help! Help me! PLEASE!"
I feel His holy arms wrap around me.
Satan and his minions no longer surround me.
I feel so at ease with Him by my side.
I feel His love for me like the ocean's tide.
"My child, My child," whispers the Light who outshines the day,
"When you needed me most, why did you go astray?
This life is hard, believe me, I know.
It is far too hard to go at it alone.
Just remember I will never leave you or forsake you,
To get through this life it takes two."
Just like that my Savior was gone,
But this moment had been too special to just move on.
I knelt and to my God I began to pray,
Asking Him all the questions I had today.
But the answer to my most important one you saved for last,
After all the others had long gone and passed.
God answered my question with love in His voice that I could not miss,
Jesus, Your answer was as simple as this:
"Where was I when your heart and soul tore?
I was on the cross, giving My life for the sins of you and so many more.
Please, beloved, do not say I am never with you,
For I have died so you can live a life anew."