My Heart Cries

My heart cries out in anguish
For the child I haven't conceived
Why do I feel such sorrow
How can I be so grieved
Like a part of me is missing
Yet it was never even here
I always thought it was my time
To hold MY child so dear
I lie awake most nights
Pondering how it should be
"By my age," I always said,
"I'll have two or three."
Life never seems to turn out
The way I want it to
But I know God's plan is perfect
And his love forever true
There are still those who criticize
And tell me all I'm doing wrong
I'm learning to ignore them
Not let them steal my song
I have a faith in God
I believe his will is best
But still I am human
And go through all the tests
Will all that said, I pray today
"Not my will, but thine
I'm just a branch,
But you, O Lord, are the vine."